Every Day
Author: OrphanActress818
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She'd given up on him once before and there was nothing now to keep her from doing so once again. All those years ago, she'd left him for much less than this.
No on the job, she'd said. Well, he'd make damn sure of that.
After all, Rule #12 had been created for a reason.
You could have bowed out gracefully
But you didn't
You knew enough to know to leave well enough alone
But you wouldn't
He could sense the change in her almost immediately. They were no longer boss and probie or even shaky partners; this time, they were equals.
This time, she never backed down.
She met each of his glares with one of her own and, even after he snapped at her and retreated to his own private world, he could sense her watching him. She was always there. She could have been just another boss, just another director, just another person for him to take orders from. She could have backed out of his life while she was still ahead. But she didn't.
But, this time, he didn't want her. She'd had her chance and Jethro Gibbs never made the same mistake twice.
I drive myself crazy tryin' to say out of my own way
The messes that I made but my secrets are so safe
The only one who gets me, yeah, you get me
It's amazin' to me
He tried everything to make her leave him alone. To make her stop trying to fix him. Damnit, he didn't want to be fixed!
His problems were the kind that could never be resolved, his wounds the kind that would never heal. He didn't need her to try. Why couldn't she just leave him alone like everyone else did…like he himself did?
But, as much as her meddling angered him, he couldn't help feeling the slightest bit proud.
How every day
Every day, every day
You save my life
He'd never remember the exact moment when he realized that he liked her trying to fix his life, when he realized that maybe, just maybe, it was actually working.
All he would remember was that slowly, ever so slowly, he started to fall for her all over again.
I come around all broken down and crowded out
And you're a comfort
Sometimes the place I go is so deep and dark and desperate
I don't know, I don't know
She never hesitated to listen, never hesitated to drop everything and just sit in silence with him, and she was one of the very few people who knew that this was his preferred form of communication. Drinking bourbon on the couch in her office or on the bench in his basement—it really didn't matter where.
How every day
Every day, every day
You save my life
Little by little, the crooked, scattered pieces of him started coming together. Little by little, memories started to fade. Maybe that was what he'd really wanted all along. Maybe that was what he'd been looking for.
She'd put him back together again and puzzle pieces never fly apart as easily the second time around.
Sometimes I swear I don't know if I'm comin' or goin'
But you always say somethin' without even knowin'
That I'm hangin' onto your words with all my might
And it's alright, yeah, I'm alright for one more night
Every day
It was the little things, he's sure of it. The disapproving glares that proved to him she really did give a damn whether he lived or died, the long-suffering sighs that indicated he'd gotten away with yet another thing she'd never let anyone else get away with, even the impossibly high heels she wore on a daily basis he knew were partly for his own amusement.
The things she'd say, the things she'd do—these were the new thoughts that plagued him at night. He didn't mind. At least they were better than the old ones.
Every day, every day, every day
Every day, every day
Every day, every day, every day
Whether she'd set out to or not, Jenny Shepard had saved his life, in more ways that one. Her gravestone and the reminders of her he saw everywhere were proof of that.
Every day, every
Every, every day
The only thing he regretted now was that he'd never gotten the chance to try and save her.
Every day you save my life
END