Seven Deadly Sins
- Superbia (Pride)-

In almost every list pride (or hubris or vanity) is considered the original and most serious of the seven deadly sins, and indeed the ultimate source from which the others arise. It is identified as a desire to be more important or attractive than others, failing to give compliments to others though they may be deserving of them, and excessive love of self.

Pride is an emotion which refers to a strong sense of self-respect, a refusal to be humiliated as well as joy in the accomplishments of oneself or a person, group, nation or object that one identifies with, or to think of one's self as being better than anyone else.

I do not have a superiority complex, I am not excessively proud, especially of myself, but something about her makes me so, I almost hate myself for it, but can't find a way to stop the swell of pride that courses through me whenever she looks at me.

I am proud of the way that she can command a room. All eyes glued to her as she floats around, talking to everyone, remembering everyone's name, their partners and children's names, making them think they are the only ones that matter. She leans her head to the side, giving the impression of total immersion in them, her green eyes big with empathy; a touch on the arm and she has them eating out of her hand.

I am proud of the way her Director mask slips back into place the second it's needed, pulling herself away from my arms and pacing her office, phone in hand, barking orders, smoothing out kinks with other agencies, hiding secrets from me that I don't need to know, it may fill me with anger but I am proud of the way she seems to effortlessly move from Jenny to Director.

I am proud of the way her eyes find mine across a room and I can feel others on me, wishing that her eyes were on them instead. I am proud of the time she found me and took my hand, drawing me onto the dance floor of the almost deserted bar and danced with me, her body almost melting into mine, proud because the look of jealousy that crossed the man in the corner's face made my heart swell and my hands pull her closer, challenging him with my eyes.

I am proud of the way adrenaline still pumps round her body when she is in the field, knowing that it was partly me that made her realize her love of field work, and proud of the way that it still turns her on and she comes to me, needing release like she always did, and of course I give it to her.

I'm proud of the way she laughs at me when I am being an idiot, her hand on my arm, squeezing lightly, telling me that it doesn't matter how much of an idiot I am, she is still there, right beside me.

I am proud of the way she stands up to me in an argument, standing just that little bit too close, her eyes flashing dangerously, voice trembling with anger. She has never been afraid of me, its what drew me to her in the first place, she was a worthy adversary, she still is. It amuses me that people still hide when we argue; don't they know it is only for show and that we both love firing each other up, raising each others blood pressure for no reason other than it excites us and fuels our desire for each other?

I am proud of the way I can make her come undone, how I can make her cry out my name, bite her bottom lip, beg for more. Although I am almost humiliated by the way she can make me beg. I love watching her come apart under me, the way her eyes widen and darken, her finger nails scraping lightly down my back or digging into my shoulder, the arch of her neck, makes me join her coming undone, makes me glad to be alive.

Most of all I am proud that she is mine and mine alone.