One thing you need to know about me: I hate crowds. I’m an extremely people-shy person, always stay away from bigger crowds and gatherings. I’m rather small (about as tall as Natalie) and slim and hate not being in control of what happens around me, which is impossible when you have people surrounding you.
But, I’ve also been a fan of Tom Hiddleston for a while, so I decided to go to the red carpet at the Berlin premiere of Thor The Dark World nevertheless. I’ve done this only once before, and it was for the Mamma Mia musical premiere, which of course is hardly comparable when it comes to the level of madness.
On the pictures you see how close I was. I was in the second row. The people around me were nice; I’d been waiting there for hours and we’d been chatting a lot. We’d agreed to help each other and so on, and on that end really everything was fine.
When Natalie, Alan Taylor and Kevin Feige came, it was all still okay(-ish). The crowd behind us had become bigger, but that was to be expected. One or two from behind we hadn’t seen till then (and you may know how you get to know each other within several hours of waiting together) tried to push us aside to get to the front, but we could still keep them back.
The Chris appeared and it got already bad, with people pushing from behind. I was lucky enough to get a few pictures, as well as an autograph on my photo (same goes for Natalie).
And then, finally, Tom came by. As I said, he was basically the reason I went there. I wanted to take a photo (not necessarily with him, I never expected that to be possible anyways; one proper picture *of* him would have been fine), have him sign my picture, and give him a letter I’d written with a few words of appreciation.
I got nothing.
Because of some stupid-ass people who pushed so hard from behind us that I became actually very scared that I’d be squeezed to death. I don’t think I’ve ever been more afraid of my health, if not life, than I was in that moment. And keep in mind that it is even worse for me who easily panics in normal crowds already.
You can say now, it’s my own fault, I didn’t need to go there. You can say I should be happy because I got autographs of Chris and Natalie, and the photos. You can say I should be happy to have been there at all, and so close to Tom, to have seen him live. I don’t care. I’m angry at all those stupid people who arrive five minutes before it all starts and then try to shove us who’ve been waiting the whole day aside. And I’m very, very sad. But I’ve learned my lesson and this was the first and last time I will ever have went to a Hollywood movie premiere.